The Beauty of Getting Things Wrong

Sometimes life presents us with awkward moments that catch us off guard but also have the most wonderful impact on us. I recently relocated from the United States to the Netherlands, and learning Dutch has been both exciting and confusing. I can manage fine with some of the more common words, such as “hello,” “good morning,” “please,” and “coffee.”

However, throwing out the occasional Dutch word in a “Dunglish” fashion does not compare to the deer-in-the-headlights moment of having a stranger strike up a casual conversation with you, not knowing that you don’t really speak the language.

So when a woman at the train station turned to me and commented on the weather, I was able to nod along… that is until she decided to ask a question that I couldn’t quite piece together. So, I hung my head and apologetically informed her: “Ik spreek Engels” (“I speak English”).

Instead of simply walking away and moving on with her day, she asked about my journey to the Netherlands and shared her own story of family members who immigrated into the country. She carefully incorporated Dutch words into the conversation such as “herfst” for “autumn” and “winter” for, well, “winter” (spelled the same but pronounced differently).

And she encouraged me to do the same, nudging me to use as many Dutch words as I possibly could. She used simple language and kindly guided me, correcting me as I uncomfortably stumbled and bumbled my way through.

And I… was absolutely terrible at it. I used so many of the wrong words. I’d say “please” when I meant “thank you” or “she” when I meant “he.” My plan was just to string together enough words I knew to get my point across, but sitting there with her smiling and patiently waiting for me to figure out how to say what I wanted to say was so awkward!

The man sitting across from us would occasionally glance up and smile, and I’m not sure if he was impressed that I was trying so hard or if he found my butchering of the Dutch language absolutely hilarious. Nevertheless, once we said our goodbyes and I exited the train, I realized that it was the first true Dutch conversation I have ever had with a native speaker.

And it was a great feeling knowing that I can (at least mildly) keep up when I was previously too afraid to even try. It was incredibly motivating.

So often, we allow our fear or discomfort to hold us back from realizing our full potential. You don’t know what you don’t know until you’ve put yourself out there. Sure, it’s a struggle, but aren’t all new things? I’m working on not focusing so much on getting things “right” but, instead, on just allowing myself to embrace the awkwardness of it all.

There is a humble beauty in getting things wrong. Of putting in the effort and not getting it right. Of challenging yourself to step outside of your comfort zone. Of learning from your mistakes and getting a little bit better each time.

Yes, you will make a mess of things at times, but you will not only reveal to yourself what you don’t know but also what you do know. Proving to yourself that all of the time you’ve spent planning and preparing has actually paid off.

I hope you take some time today to do something uncomfortable. Embrace that awkward feeling… then do it again… and again. Until it’s a little less awkward and maybe, just maybe, you may embrace something new.